A drunk was hauled into court. "Mister",

A drunk was hauled into court. "Mister",
the judge began,
"you've been brought here for drinking...."
"Great," the drunk exclaimed.
When do we get started?

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Love is photogenic

Love is photogenic; it needs darkness to develop!

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ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY

ALCOHOL KILLS SLOWLY. So what? who's in a hurry?

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Your future depends on your dreams

Your future depends on your dreams. So go to sleep!

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Living on Earth may be expensive

Living on Earth may be expensive...but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun.

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Don't frown.

Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile.

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How come "abbreviated"

How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?

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Since light travels faster than sound

Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.

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If it's true that we are here to help others

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

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A bus station is where a bus stops.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where train stops. On my desk, I have a work station

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I was born intelligent

I was born intelligent... education ruined me

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If your father is a poor man,

If your father is a poor man, it is your fate but, if your father-in-law is a poor man , it's your stupidity.

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The best way to prevent a hangover

The best way to prevent a hangover is to stay drunk.

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War doesn't determine who's right

War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who is left

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If at first you don't succeed

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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your absence.

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

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I never repeat myself

As I said before, I never repeat myself.

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The statement below is true.

The statement below is true.













The statement above is false.

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If I save time

If I save time, when do I get it back?

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I'm a nobody

I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect , and therefore I'm perfect.

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